Your Love Coach

The Fairy Tale

Did you grow up fantasizing about your knight in shining armour or Prince Charming or your very own beautiful princess? Did you dream of living happily ever after?

Before the advent of feminism, many a woman (and man) were obsessed with the fairy tale - which is actually a myth.

As a love coach and an incurable romantic I shall not rob you of the notion that love at first sight happens and that people do find and marry their soul mates.

However, for most people, this is not the case. Women have wised up to the fact that they don’t need to be rescued by prince’s kiss. They simply avoid eating poisoned apples or pricking themselves with a needle.

I am reminded of a poem.

For Every Woman
by Nancy R. Smith

For every woman who is tired of acting weak when she knows she is strong, there is a man who is tired of appearing strong when he feels vulnerable.

For every woman who is tired of acting dumb, there is a man who is burdened with the constant expectation of “knowing everything.”

For every woman who is tired of being called “an emotional female,” there is a man who is denied the right to weep and to be gentle.

For every woman who is called unfeminine when she competes, there is a man for whom competition is the only way to prove his masculinity.

For every woman who is tired of being a sex object, there is a man who must worry about his potency.

For every woman who feels “tied down” by her children, there is a man who is denied the full pleasures of shared parenthood.

For every woman who is denied meaningful employment or equal pay, there is a man who must bear full financial responsibility for another human being.

For every woman who was not taught the intricacies of an automobile, there is a man who was not taught the satisfactions of cooking.

For every woman who takes a step toward her own liberation, there is a man who finds the way to freedom has been made a little easier.

What do you think of that? Do you agree with the poem? Which is your favourite line?

This is also why I have singled out another romance film which I truly love - Ever After . Though set in a century long ago, it has a very contemporary twist to it.

Danielle de Barbarac was no princess waiting to be rescued. She in fact in so many instances rescued others - including her prince!

This is a must-see film! It is such a refreshing take on the fairy tale Cinderella. Released in 1998, it stars Drew Barrymore and Dougray Scott and features one of my favourite songs Put Your Arms Around Me by Texas.

One thing I believe. We can write our own fairy tale. We simply need to choose the characters very carefully. And the best thing about fairy tales is summed up by a quote from the movie, “And, while Cinderella and her prince did live happily ever after, the point, gentlemen, is that they lived.”

So what would your own fairy tale be called?

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