Romantic is a place, a state of mind, or an ambience that lends itself conducive for two people to fall in love or keep the embers of passion burning.  If that were the definition we were to go by, then romantic becomes highly subjective.

Polling people about the most romantic places in the world, the most obvious answers would include Europe, the Caribbean and places in South America.  Therefore, let’s name a few that may prove useful to those who think it’s their kind of romantic place, either to propose, spend their honeymoon or surprise their significant other on their birthday or anniversary.

1...]]> What is romantic to one person, could be blase or too exotic to another.  We all have varying notions of what is romantic.  So first, let’s define romantic.

Romantic is a place, a state of mind, or an ambience that lends itself conducive for two people to fall in love or keep the embers of passion burning.  If that were the definition we were to go by, then romantic becomes highly subjective.

Polling people about the most romantic places in the world, the most obvious answers would include Europe, the Caribbean and places in South America.  Therefore, let’s name a few that may prove useful to those who think it’s their kind of romantic place, either to propose, spend their honeymoon or surprise their significant other on their birthday or anniversary.

1. Paris - They say that it’s a city for lovers.  I thought of Paris as a city of light, great food and wine, beautiful buildings, and strolling along Champs Elysees with someone you love can be the most exciting thing.  Dine by candle light in front of the Eiffel tower, stroll down by the Seine, and have a picnic in the park. Paris exudes romance and has been charming couples for centuries.

The capital city of France, Paris is bohemian, artistic, stylish and is one of the favourites of all times for a romantic break. In Paris, it’s ok to start being poetic, as the place almost expects it of you.  Let Paris stimulate your inner senses and awaken the latent romantic in you.

This city will suit any type of budget, however, it is still Paris and it’s not going to be cheap.  If you have a bit of cash to spend, I would recommend the four-star hotel Royal Elysees as it is right in the middle of everything, beside the Arc de Triomphe.  And if you want to pop ‘the question’, what better place than on top of the Eiffel Tower with the wind blowing freely through your hair?  I know, I know, it may not be as romantic since that’s where Tom Cruise did it, too, but hey, do it with your own flare.

2. Venice - How can anything be more romantic on a summer’s day, or night, than a ride in a gondola in this Italian city of romance?  Cuddled up with your loved one as you watch Venice go by as you ride down the canals.  Dine in fancy, or not, Italian restaurants by the square or the water, savouring the best pizzas and pastas and Italian wine.  Discover alleyways where you can steal kisses from each other, while stumbling upon Italian churches and squares.  Without a doubt, Venice is a place that will make you fall in love all over again.

Venice is the City of Canals, Palaces, stunning architecture, gondolas, serenades and love. This is where water and land intertwine and live perfectly in harmony. I would recommend the ancient and fabulous renovated Principe Hotel which has a four-star rating. This beautiful hotel is located in a very historic building and right on the canals. So, serenade her significant other and express your love.

3. Bruges - This medieval city in Brussels is a great way to escape back in time. Bruges is a quite little town that has gone out of its way to preserve its history to our benefit. Stroll through ancient city streets and dine at outdoor cafes as you leap back into time. Experience a historic European city without the madding crowd of London or Amsterdam, but with all the charm - the way a romantic destination should be.

Medieval Bruges is ripe with symbols of love, from the Gothic churches and 17th-century mansions, to the sparkling canals and flower markets. It has all the allure of Venice, without the crowds. Even the government promotes romance: a statue near City Hall honors couples who have been married there.  Need I say more?

4. Tuscany - Vineyards, villas, and historic Italian towns- this whole place is a romantic adventure. Hire a villa, eat the best food and cycle through the best vineyards to drink the best wine. You will most likely see why so much filming takes place in Tuscany, and why no one wants to leave. In Tuscany, you will also find authentic Italian cooking classes that lasts either a day, two or a week.  This is something else you may want to do with your significant other.  What is sexier than preparing food together with your own hands, and what’s more romantic than sharing the fruits of your labour?

5. Hawaii - It is like a paradise like no other.  It is also one of the most popular honeymoon destinations in the world, especially among Americans. It offers excellent options for couples. White sand beaches, tropical jungles, luxurious suites, surfing, diving, parasailing and an abundance of wildlife. It is so easy to forget that there is a world that exists outside Hawaii.

6. Maldives - These twenty-three tiny islands, only five of which are occupied, located in the middle of the Indian Ocean are another of the world’s paradises. The tiny coral atolls are above sea water and the surrounding reefs are teeming with marine life. Secluded and quite, they are a great place for an upscale romantic getaway.  What makes it exclusive is that one of the remaining uninhabited islands has been entirely converted into a resort that’s accessible only by seaplane. Here, amid wind-dancing palms and endless blue expanses of ocean and sky, you’ll experience a sense of profound isolation and paradise-like island beauty. In addition to your significant other, excellent dive sites and abundant marine life will make your heart skip a beat.

7. Lake Como - Italy has its own Lake District. You’ll find yourself inextricably drawn to the beauty of Lake Garda, Lake Como, Lake Maggiore and even the intimate Lake Orta. I got to experience the allure and beauty of Lake Como, and I can’t wait to go back.  Stay in a lakeside villa, a secluded castle or a panoramic chapel.  Or you can stay in a hotel that has a view of the lake.  It can be quite pricey, but believe me, it is worth it.  There is plenty to do in Como: visit Villa Carolina, enjoy the different flavours of gelati, hop on and off the water bus as you explore each stop down the lake, and go shop at the quaint little places along the way. Or perhaps drop in on George Clooney at his Villa Oleandra!

8. Positano - Built dramatically into the vertiginous Amalfi coast, Positano is for sun slaves, water babies, gastronomes—and lovers. Reserve a front-row table on a summer evening at a waterside restaurant, order a pizza and a glass of Brunello, and enjoy the parade of couples entwined as tightly as allowed by Italian law. Consider it inspiration.

9. Seville - This is the capital of Andalusia, a treasure box of Christian and Moorish architecture.  Not miss are the Catedral de Sevilla and the Alcazar. Explore both, then peek into the secret gardens of the Barrio de Santa Cruz. Wind up the perfect date by catching the sun rise over the Guadalquivir River.  It’s a sure winner.

10. Devon - South Devon’s tiny, tidal Burgh Island feels as if it stepped out of the pages of an English adventure tale — and not just because its coves and caves were much loved by Agatha Christie and Noël Coward. Stay at the only place there is to stay: the nostalgic, gleaming white Burgh Island Hotel, an Art Deco palace full of mirrors, generous suites, long cocktail hours, and, most of all, lots of light.

I’m not done.  There’s plenty more to list.  Do come back to read the next part of this post, as I have more romantic places to share with you!  But so far, which of the ten appeal most to you?

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I’ve just had a chat with someone who told me that the person they fell in love with 5 years ago is no longer the person they live with now...]]> Have you heard of the expression it’s better to be alone than to wish you were alone?

I’ve just had a chat with someone who told me that the person they fell in love with 5 years ago is no longer the person they live with now. And as a love coach, my question was: what’s stopping you from leaving?

And the reply was:

I’m afraid to be alone.

And this is a natural thing. As human beings we are all wired to crave companionship, to find similarities with others, to seek love and affection from the moment we are born.

However, one should be able to distinguish between needing someone and genuinely loving someone. Our happiness should not be dependent on someone’s presence in our lives. True, having a significant other who cherishes us is the sweetest thing in the world - but even they are not responsible for our own happiness.

Being single is one of the best ways to find deep, lasting and passionate love. How? By learning to love yourself first!

There are a number of things you should do before getting into a relationship:

1. List down the things you enjoy doing - alone or otherwise - and do them on your own, like watching a movie or eating out
2. Travel alone, discover new cultures, make new friends, and see what’s really out there.
3. Explore your options. Career, see the world, have a committed relationship and/or keep dating.
4. Enjoy your own company. This is crucial. Unless you are comfortable in your own skin, happy spending time on your own and can amuse yourself, then it would be very difficult to have your own identity in a relationship.
5. Decide what you like and love about yourself. Believe them and live them. It’s only when you exude that particular self-confidence, of loving yourself, that the right people find you attractive and are drawn to you even if they don’t know why.
6. Be happy. I will always say this: learn to be happy on your own first, so that when you do find someone, that someone should also be happy being on their own. Then when you get together, you share each other’s happiness and become happier. And should you decide to part ways at some point, then you’re simply go back to being happy.
7. Have a life. It’s pretty difficult to share a life with someone else, when you haven’t made one for yourself. After all, you aren’t joined at the hip and so you need to have something that is truly your own to make you, your life and the life you share even more interesting.

Being single is not the end of the world. In fact in many cases, it can be quite liberating and just what people need in order to find themselves, re-discover who they are and know the kind of person they truly want to share their lives and selves with.

It’s ok to be afraid of being single, as long as you do something about it. And by this I don’t mean grab the first person who comes your way, but that you should face your fear when the opportunity presents itself and muster enough courage to try doing some, if not all, of my suggestions above.

Wishing you all the love you deserve!

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But what if you still love the person but are extremely unhappy?..]]> Does breaking up with your significant other have any advantage? That depends: if you are in an abusive relationship, there is no doubt about it, breaking up and breaking away from that person is the best thing you can do!

But what if you still love the person but are extremely unhappy? What do you do?

Recently a friend of mine left her boyfriend of 5 years because the relationship no longer brought her the joy they once had. It was a heart-wrenching decision but she did it anyway.

She was sorry to go and thought about the 5 years they’ve been together. But that didn’t stop her from her resolve to leave. And a good thing, too, that she did!

Now they are back together and the love is better than ever. So what happened?

Often times people fall in love in the most romantic and extraordinary circumstances. And even if they don’t, the relationship starts out wonderfully, the two people involved being considerate, kind and loving towards each other.

Then life happens. Challenges come their way and the relationship is put to the test. I would never advocate giving up on a relationship at the first sign of trouble, unless there are extenuating circumstances - like your partner tried to kill you. Otherwise, you do have to try and work it out. Mind you, you can’t work on a relationship unless both people are happy and willing to do that.

Before the going gets tough it’s important that you set the ground rules for the relationship. Examples of which are:

1. We keep calm and avoid raising our voices when arguing and discussing.
2. We talk to each other first before seeking advice from others.
3. We remain respectful, no swearing, no hitting or throwing things.
4. We give each other space to think when asked for.
5. We are honest and open about our feelings all the time to avoid guessing games and leaving the other person wondering.
6. We let the other person know where we are, and not just take off somewhere leaving the other person worried.
7. We will listen to each other with an open heart and mind.

These are just some of the things you can live by and you can add your own to the list.

Sometimes these rules go out the window when tempers rise and the frustration has built up. And that is not a good thing. It shouldn’t even reach that point for the couple to know that something is amiss.

And this was what happened to my friend and her partner. One evening she decided that although she still loved him, she has had enough and so she left. Day and night she cried, while he tried to convince her to come back.

But hard as he tried to do that she wouldn’t give in, and his language became abusive. In the end he mellowed and decided that it was not going to bring her back if he kept this macho pretense and simply decided to open up his heart and told her how much he loved her. He apologised for all that he’s done. He did try to excuse his behaviour by using work, but that didn’t fly.

They had a heart to heart talk and she decided to go back to him. Now the relationship is even lovelier!

I posted a Getting Your Ex Back entry a few weeks ago and true enough, my friend’s ex was able to win her back because:

1. They still loved each other.
2. They were both free agents.
3. They still lived in the same city.
4. The issues for the separation were addressed.
5. They each have made changes in how they behave towards the other.
6. They are both committed to make the relationship work.

When the love is right, and it feels right, sometimes all it takes is losing it for you to find it again. It could be with the same person, or may be with someone else.

Here’s to love and romance!

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From Wiki:

Chocolate is comprised of a number of raw and processed foods that are produced from the seed of the tropical cacao tree...]]> I have yet to find anyone who does not like chocolates. How can they not love the heavenly sensual delight one experiences as soon as chocolate makes contact with their tongue?

From Wiki:

Chocolate is comprised of a number of raw and processed foods that are produced from the seed of the tropical cacao tree. Native to lowland, tropical South America, cacao has been cultivated for three millennia in Central America and Mexico, with its earliest documented use around 1100 BC. The majority of the Mesoamerican peoples made chocolate beverages, including the Maya and Aztecs, who made it into a beverage known as xocolatl, a Nahuatl word meaning “bitter water”. The seeds of the cacao tree have an intense bitter taste, and must be fermented to develop the flavor. After being roasted and ground, the result is chocolate or cocoa.

Much of the chocolate consumed today is made into bars that combine cocoa solids, fats like cocoa butter, and sugar. Chocolate has become one of the most popular flavours in the world.

Chocolate contains alkaloids such as theobromine and phenethylamine which have physiological effects on the body. It has been linked to serotonin levels in the brain. Scientists claim that chocolate, eaten in moderation, can lower blood pressure. Dark chocolate has recently been promoted for its health benefits, including a substantial amount of antioxidants that reduce the formation of free radicals, though the presence of theobromine renders it toxic to some animals.

In November, 2007, archeologists reported finding evidence of the oldest known cultivation and use of cacao at a site in Puerto Escondido, Honduras, dating from about 1100 to 1400 BC.

Roughly two-thirds of the entire world’s cocoa is produced in Western Africa, with 43% sourced from Côte d’Ivoire.

More recently, it has been suggested that theobromine and other chemicals found in chocolate, most notably phenethylamine, can act as mild sexual stimulants. While there is no firm proof that chocolate is indeed an aphrodisiac, a gift of chocolate is a familiar courtship ritual.

Moreover, over 1,500 years ago in South America chocolate gained the reputation of being an aphrodisiac where it was considered to have mystical powers by the Mayan and Aztecs cultures. The Aztec emperor, Monteczuma, drank fifty golden goblets of chocolate a day to enhance his sexual prowess. In the film, Ever After, Prince Henri said that the Spanish discovered chocolates, true, but only after the South Americans did!

The main substances found in chocolate are Phenylethylamine and Serotonin, which are mood lifting agents. Human bodies have them naturally and are released when we are happy, experiencing strong emotions like love, passion and lust.

Eating chocolates also induces release of these substances - thus we feel happy. Rumours have it that Casanova consumed chocolate for its aphrodisiac qualities before engaging in wild passionate sex with his conquests.

Whether chocolate is indeed an aphrodisiac is subjective in my opinion. Some may find gastronomic delight after its consumption, others may benefit from it more. But whatever we think of chocolates it is undeniable that the pleasure one gain after it melts sensuously in their mouth comes second to none.

How do you then pick the best chocolate for your valentine?

Here are the things you should bear in mind when choosing:

1. Freshness is key. In case you bought chocolates more than 2 weeks ago, forget giving them to someone you want to impress. The fresher the chocolate, the better the experience.
2. You get what you pay for. I’m not saying that you should buy the most expensive chocolates on the market, but don’t go with the cheapest either.
3. No calorie counting. If you’re giving the chocolates to someone diabetic, then by all means go for sugar-free. Otherwise, indulge!
4. No gift recycling. It is in bad taste if you give a box of chocolates intended for you to someone else.
5. Purchase flavours loved by the recipient. At the same time, it is also a good idea to include a couple of flavours you particularly like. In case they don’t like them, just say that you’re trying to share with them the experience of the chocolate, by sharing a part of you.
6. Size doesn’t matter. Look, you can buy them the biggest block of shell of chocolate or the tiniest. What matters most is how the chocolate tastes and the thought that went into buying it.
7. Be adventurous. You may have some trusted chocolatier, but perhaps it may be best to go with another supplier, one who’s highly recommended by their clients.

Here’s a list of some of the top chocolatiers:

1. Christopher Norman Chocolates
2. Aglamesis
3. Docwra’s
4. MarieBelle New York
5. Lake Champlain Chocolates
6. Cocoa Mountain
7. Romanicos Chocolate
8. L.A. Burdick Handmade Chocolates
9. Kshocolat
10. La Maison du Chocolat
11. Vosges Chocolates
12. Hot Chocolates
13. Richard Paris
14. Plaisir du Chocolat
15. Recchiuti Confections
16. Coco of Bruntsfield
17. Payard
18. Charlotte Flower Chocolates

Lastly, whatever chocolate you decide to procure - even though it is the cheapest chocolate you could find - nothing is sweeter than the loving words from your heart, nothing more sensual than the touch of your lips, and nothing could inspire passion more than the caress of an ardent lover.

Have the most sensual Valentine’s Day!

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Things to do on Valentine’s Day