Welcome To Finding Love
Your Love Coach is a home for people looking for love or wanting to keep the passion and excitement in a healthy relationship alive. Explore the site and enjoy your visit. Participate in the forum. If you have a burning question about love or romance, just send me a note. From one hopeful romantic to another, I leave you with Pablo Neruda’s words, from Sonnet XVII:
“I love you without knowing how, or when, or where from,
I love you simply, without complexities or pride;
I love you in this way, not knowing any other way of loving
but this, in which neither I nor you exist
so close that your hand on my breast is mine,
so close that your eyes close when I sleep.”
Single On Valentine’s Day?
The one day most single people wish to delete from the calendar is Valentine’s Day. There’s nothing like couples walking hand in hand, or women carrying a bouquet of roses, or partners enjoying a romantic meal that says, “You’re alone on the day of hearts”. In today’s lavish expressions of affection in a capitalist world, it is hard to miss the red hearts and flower cut-outs in shops and store windows.
So what if you are single? Should you mope around on Valentine’s Day? Are couples the only people licensed to have fun?
Things to do on Valentine’s Day if you’re single:
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Surviving Valentine’s Day If You’re Single
Look, just because everyone seems to be pairing up on this day, doesn’t mean you have to desperately hook up with someone just so you don’t get left out.
Trust me - it’s better to be alone, than to wish you were alone!
Now watch this. I’m sure you’ll pick up a few ideas on how to survive Valentine’s Day if you’re single.
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Getting A Last Minute Valentine’s Date
If you are really keen on getting a date, and are prepared to do whatever it takes, perhaps this video is for you!
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The Day of Hearts
February, across most of the world, candy, flowers and gifts are exchanged between loved ones, and friends, in the name of St Valentine. I remember writing an article about Valentine’s Day back in 1989 that was published in The La Sallian, the official university paper in English. The one thing that I can never forget was the fact that people spent more on Valentine’s Day than Christmas.
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A Romantic Valentine’s Day
From today, you shall learn a few techniques on having a very romantic Valentine’s Day with your significant other, a new interest or by your lonesome.
But first, watch this video and take note of some tips.
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Valentine Traditions
Hundreds of years ago in England, many children dressed up as adults on Valentine’s Day. They went singing from home to home. One verse they sang was:
Good morning to you, valentine;
Curl your locks as I do mine —
Two before and three behind.
Good morning to you, valentine.
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Love Surprises
Yesterday didn’t get off to a good start. By noon I wanted my significant other to swing by my office to give me a hug and have lunch with me as well.
When I rang him he said that he was inundated with work himself and could not dine with me, but would happily drive to where I was to give me a hug. I said that would not be reasonable and that I’ll just see him at the end of the day.
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Erotic Love Letter
And of course, I couldn’t leave the subject of love letters without giving an example of an erotic love letter. Do you struggle writing one? What elements make a good erotic love letter?
The main thing you have to remember when writing an erotic love letter is to forget about being shy. This is about being open and honest to a person you are intimate with. In the same way one writes a love letter, an erotic love letter can be written well if we express true feelings and thoughts.
Talk about a sexual fantasy, or a lingerie you saw in the window shop and what you imagine to be doing with it with your lover. You can also talk about a scene in a movie that you saw that you would like to do with your partner. It can also be something that you and your lover already shared, which left you wanting for more!
The technique is in being able to paint the picture and create the erotic feelings in your beloved. Before sending off the letter, read it out loud to yourself. If by the end of reading it you feel like making love to your beloved, then you’ve got yourself a well written erotic love letter.
Find below an example.
An erotic love letter
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A Letter from Beethoven to His Immortal Beloved
If you enjoy classical music from the Romantic period, then you will know Ludwig van Beethoven very well. I particularly enjoy his Moonlight Sonata. It’s like music written for God.
He also has a song called Fur Elise (For Elise), who is his Immortal Beloved.
A letter from Beethoven to His Immortal Beloved
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Elizabeth Barrett to Robert Browning
Who can ever forget Sonnets From the Portuguese, Stanza XLIII, that every decent English teacher in high school makes their students memorize?
“How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of everyday’s
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love thee with a passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints, — I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! — and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.”
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I am Dr Joy Barredo, your love coach. I enjoy helping people find love, move on from a heartbreak or keep the romance alive in their relationship. I am a hopeful romantic and a realist at the same time.